Current:Home > reviewsJoe Biden finally acknowledged his granddaughter. Many know the pain of a family fracture. -CapitalCourse
Joe Biden finally acknowledged his granddaughter. Many know the pain of a family fracture.
View
Date:2025-04-14 01:16:42
President Joe Biden acknowledged his seventh grandchild publicly for the first time on Friday − but his hesitancy to do so struck a nerve among his supporters and detractors alike.
Several Biden supporters in Philadelphia recently told USA TODAY the president's refusal to publicly mention his 4-year-old granddaughter in Arkansas, whom his son Hunter Biden fathered out of wedlock, while still talking about his other six grandchildren didn't sit right with them. On Friday, the president mentioned his granddaughter publicly for the first time in a statement to People magazine that read: "This is not a political issue, it’s a family matter. Jill and I only want what is best for all of our grandchildren, including Navy.”
Unfortunately, family fractures, including estrangement and disownment, are not uncommon experiences, and they can have debilitating effects on one's mental health and wellbeing, experts say. Chelsey Cole, a psychotherapist and author, estimates over half her therapy clients have experienced a break in their families − a pain that she says can be extraordinary for all those involved.
"Research suggests that the same parts of the brain that process physical pain also process emotional pain, so being cut off or isolated or betrayed or rejected or disowned by your family physically hurts," she says, adding that isolation and loneliness brought on by family estrangement put people at higher risk of anxiety, depression, heart disease and cognitive decline.
The mental health toll of family estrangement
A family can fracture for a lot of reasons; a marriage that some members don't approve of, a feud that went unresolved, substance abuse that hurt those in its wake.
Therapist Gregorio Lozano III says the pain of family abandonment is a primal one, originating from humanity's earliest ancestors. It's stressful and upsetting both for the person who has decided to end contact with a certain family, but especially for the person on the receiving end of that behavior.
"When we experienced a rejection from the tribe, that meant a life or death situation," he says. "Now, we don't have that aspect, but we still have the emotional trauma that can result from that."
For many, family is a core part of one's identity. When someone is disowned or kept from having a relationship with their family, it can undermine their sense of self and self-worth.
"A lot of our identity is tied up into our family: 'Who are my parents? What kind of family do I come from? What do we believe?' " Cole says. "When there is this discord or disconnection or fracture in the family, it affects people to their core."
Watch out:Are you ruining your relationship without even realizing it?
Family estrangement can also lead someone to believe that something is "fundamentally wrong with them," Cole says, which can impact the other relationships they have throughout their life.
"You just never feel like you fit in. You don't know where you belong," she says. "In relationships, you consistently wonder, 'What did they mean by that? Are they mad at me? Why did they say that? Did I do something wrong?' You're constantly wondering, 'Is this relationship OK?' You're constantly taking the emotional temperature of the relationship."
More:Who should you be spending more time with? 6 types of people to keep close.
How to heal from a fractured family
If you're struggling with the pain of your family being estranged, therapists offer the following advice:
- Seek therapy: Family fractures can bring on all kinds of mental health concerns that are best treated by professionals.
- Feel your feelings: Allowing yourself to acknowledge a feeling can be healthier than repressing it, Lozano says. "It's more of what we do with those feelings that matters."
- Build an identity outside your family: Finding passions, hobbies, community and values outside of family can help build self-worth and self-efficacy, Cole says.
- Reflect on how your family fracture may be affecting your other relationships: It's important to take stock of how feelings brought on by a fractured familial relationship may be impacting your other relationships, says psychiatrist Dr. Dion Metzger. "When there's an issue within our family and we feel estranged, it does affect how we approach our relationships, our romantic relationships and our friendships," she says.
- Find healthy relationships: For people with fractured families, Cole stresses the importance of "finding other healthy relationships where you do feel seen or you feel appreciated and supported and connected."
Joe Biden is using a CPAP machineWhat to know about sleep apnea
veryGood! (34192)
Related
- Realtor group picks top 10 housing hot spots for 2025: Did your city make the list?
- Who is No Doubt? Gwen Stefani had to explain band to son ahead of Coachella reunion
- Report: California officers shot in ambush were not verbally warned that suspect had gun, was on PCP
- Central Park 5 exoneree and council member says police stopped him without giving a reason
- 'We're reborn!' Gazans express joy at returning home to north
- A Texas 2nd grader saw people experiencing homelessness. She used her allowance to help.
- North Macedonia parliament approves caretaker cabinet with first-ever ethnic Albanian premier
- Shohei Ohtani joining Dodgers 'made too much sense' says Stan Kasten | Nightengale's Notebook
- San Francisco names street for Associated Press photographer who captured the iconic Iwo Jima photo
- Suddenly unemployed in your 50s? What to do about insurance, savings and retirement.
Ranking
- The FBI should have done more to collect intelligence before the Capitol riot, watchdog finds
- 'American Fiction,' 'Poor Things' get box-office boost from Oscar nominations
- Former New Jersey public official gets probation after plea to misusing township workers
- Ashley Park Shares Health Update After Hospitalization for Septic Shock
- The Super Bowl could end in a 'three
- Taylor Swift and Jason Kelce Support Travis Kelce at AFC Championship
- 2 are in custody after baby girl is found abandoned behind dumpsters in Mississippi
- Kate, princess of Wales, is discharged from London hospital after abdominal surgery
Recommendation
Megan Fox's ex Brian Austin Green tells Machine Gun Kelly to 'grow up'
How shoot lasers into the sky could help deflect lightning
More highlights from the 2024 Sundance Film Festival
2 are in custody after baby girl is found abandoned behind dumpsters in Mississippi
Don't let hackers fool you with a 'scam
Ravens QB Lamar Jackson catches own pass. That's right, Gisele, he throws and catches ball
See the moment climate activists throw soup at the ‘Mona Lisa’ in Paris
Toyota chief apologizes for cheating on testing at group company _ again